Madame Chiang

I don't....honestly!!!!!!!!!

2009-10-23T18:52:00.003+08:00

The Law of Exclamation

First recorded in an article by Lori Robertson at FactCheck.org in 2008, this states: "The more exclamation points used in an email (or other posting), the more likely it is a complete lie. This is also true for excessive capital letters."

It is reminiscent of the claim in Terry Pratchett's Discworld novels that the more exclamation marks someone uses in writing, the more likely they are to be mentally unbalanced.

According to Pratchett, five exclamation marks is an indicator of "someone who wears their underwear on the outside".

I do use a lot of exclamation marks.... but I wear my underwear on the inside...(if I'm wearing any at all!)

I'm trying to think of an analogy for this story....

2009-10-21T19:03:00.002+08:00

but my little brain is too confused...

Vatican welcomes Anglicans into Catholic Church

The Vatican said Tuesday it has worked out a way for groups of Anglicans who are dissatisfied with their faith to join the Catholic Church

The process will enable groups of Anglicans to become Catholic and recognize the pope as their leader, yet have parishes that retain Anglican rites, Vatican officials said. The move comes some 450 years after King Henry VIII broke from Rome and created the Church of England, forerunner of the Anglican Communion.

The parishes would be led by former Anglican clergy -- including those who are married -- who would be ordained as Catholic priests, said the Rev. James Massa, ecumenical director of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops.

All about Arthur...

2009-10-18T11:28:00.004+08:00

Because two cats were not enough trouble...we've added a hound into the mix... meet Arthur...the bounciest Golden Retriever..ever...

This is what he does when he doesn't want to do something...

This is Arthur looking for the large stick that has been thrown into the ocean for him...he really is not the best Retriever...he never finds the stick and it always ends up with us going into the ocean to retrieve it..

He's also at the lovely age where he humps everything in sight... yesterday at the beach he decided that he rather fancied a little bit of action with a little German Pointer...he finally cornered her at the edge of a private swimming pool (part of two very expensive villas at Seminyak beach) and as he leapt on her, he slid off her back right into the swimming pool...he swam around in the pool in the centre for about 10 minutes before he came anywhere near the edge and I could haul him out...

He's ok with the cats...he's learnt not to annoy them...the Kitten and he I think will eventually be friends.. Chiang Kai-shek..forget it.. He is another source of food for the kitten who has decided she much prefers the crunchy dog food...

"I have been so misunderstood"....

2009-09-26T14:13:00.002+08:00

An interview with Imelda Marcos...

“I envy almost everybody, I even envy the beggars in the street because they don’t steal. They humiliate themselves to be beggars,” she said.

Makes me wonder what else I've missed.....

2009-08-17T14:24:00.004+08:00

Of course...it could only be a news item from the Philippines that would make me wake up after such a long break...

I have been lurking around a few blogs recently...but hadn't clicked over to MLQ3 for a while, in addition I hadn't read any of the Philippine papers online for about 2 weeks so I had missed the uproar over GMA's light dinner snack whilst Stateside....

I can't comment on the events...but trust me it is fascinating/entertaining/appalling reading...

from MLQ3 here
and from Torn & Frayed here (I love that comment under the picture of GMA...another alternative could have been "...and the bill was this long"

The upshot of all this seems to be that she doesn't want her plane anymore...

In addition...

2008-07-08T14:13:00.002+08:00

Just to continue the answers from last night...

David Bowie's wife is Iman, not Imran Khan as was suggested by myself!!!

I still think my water will go my drain the other way when I get to Bali...I don't care about the Coriolis effect, and I'm sure Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy would agree with me!

And for the record, I promise never to skim your blog again...I will read all posts from now on, with the utmost of attention and diligence.

To answer your questions...

2008-07-08T00:24:00.003+08:00

E@L, these answers are for you..

It's hardly surprising you couldn't figure out the last line....

But I would walk 500 miles
And I would walk 500 more
Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles
To fall down at your door

Hong Kong's Pink Couple....Brenda and Kaibong Chau

Hopewell Centre, part of Hopewell Holdings, whose head honcho is Gordon Wu.

And finally...an inflation of dolls

Breaking the law...

2008-06-24T16:33:00.004+08:00

Other than driving over the speed limit, I have never knowingly broken a law in any country at any time....

However, whilst perusing Rab's latest trivia posting; I notice that..

'In Thailand, it's illegal to leave your home if you're not wearing underwear'.

Now, I don't break this law all the time, however, in times of emergency...(don't even ask!!) I have had to go commando for short periods of time!!

Signs of Bangkok

2008-06-19T21:40:00.001+08:00

Advert for an underwear shop in MBK

sign on the back of taxi front seat

The Kitten has been fixed!

2008-06-19T11:33:00.004+08:00

Given our impending departure for Bali, I decided I had to stop procrastinating in the 'fixing' of the kitten...procrastination was due mainly to the trek it takes to get to the vet (which will be described later!).

So last Thursday I dropped the kitten off at the vet before work for her little 'operation', instructions received from the vet were that I could pick her up after work on Friday. We agreed that I would come to the vets about 8-8:30 in the evening.

Friday at about 6pm my phone rang...the Vet..."Where are you? We are waiting"..I reminded them that we had agreed between 8-8:30..."I know, but I want to go home now, so you have to come now"...rushing anywhere in BKK traffic, during the rushhour on a Friday night..is just never going to happen...but, I downed tools immediately, bolted out the door and then sat in traffic for the next hour, finally reaching the vet at 7:15pm.

The Kitten looked very subdued, not happy...mainly due to the huge collar around her neck (exhibit A & B).

The collar meant that her sense of direction and balance etc were all over the place, when we got home she kept reversing everywhere, wouldn't turn round properly and kept stopping still in the middle of rooms and corridors...not a happy Kitten!

I had to take her back to the vet on Monday evening to have the wound checked. Appointment was for 6:30pm. The plan was to leave work at 5pm...this is how the evening panned out....

4:50pm - leave basement (second basement) office (no windows, no idea of weather outside) with the aim of getting a taxi...look out the window and realise it is pissing (and I mean pissing!) with rain...(exhibit C & D)

4:55pm - grab umbrella from unsuspecting colleague! And go stand outside in the rain

5:30pm - finally get a taxi...by now am soaked, head, shoulders, bag, trousers up the crotch..shoes ruined...all soaked...

6:30pm - finally get home ( a trip of normally 10 minutes) to grap unsuspecting and unhappy kitten.... Kitten has (I realise belatedly) ripped off her collar and when I go to look for it...she has hidden it somewhere...

6:45pm - call vets...tell them I'm late due to weather etc..but am on the way. Leave my flat...down to the road side...water by this stage about half way to my knees (I have changed to grotty trousers and flip flops and hence look a sight!)

6:47pm - it starts to rain harder (if that's possible) and the wind starts blowing too...therefore myself AND the Kitten are now soaking...and both fairly miserable...

7:00pm - finally a taxi arrives (and stops) that will take an animal and a wet gweipo/farang/wild woman of Borneo...all pile in...got to love that air con...take kitten out of box and put underneath my Tshirt to warm her up..or at least try to...

8pm - finally arrive at the vet; ignore comment from receptionst along the lines of "You're late and will have to wait for next appointment".

8:10pm - vet calls us in...all ok...come back Wednesday for the stitches to be taken out....

8:20pm - outside again, in the pissing rain, waiting for a taxi...

8:40pm - elephant comes out of a neighbouring soi...goes to the animal hospital..they open the doors, elephant kneels down sticks his head in the door and vet does something to its trunk - elephant then stands up and leaves...vet locks double doors - only in Thailand!

9pm - get a taxi...after having to agree to pay about 10 times the normal rate....

10pm - get home....

11pm - find the collar.....

Midnight - discover the Kitten happily watching TV!! (exhibit E)

They start 'em young in Thailand

2008-06-19T11:31:00.005+08:00

This is the billboard collection that I stand and stare at each morning whilst waiting for a taxi....

no idea what the little boy is saying/thinking...but judging by the drooling can't be good!!

I was thwarted...

2008-06-19T11:24:00.008+08:00

A few days back I wanted to post a gratuitious Daniel Craig picture, but could not due to Bloody Blogger's picture thingy (technical term) not working! However, now it is...so here it is...!!

UPDATE:
I would like to point out that this didn't work the first 15 times I tried this on my PC..had to wait until I got home to my Mac to upload the sodding picture....

What in God's name is Unitarian Universalism?!

2008-06-19T10:58:00.005+08:00

Given that I was christened Church of Scotland and that I really have not been involved in any organised religion since I was confirmed at 13; (the last time I was at a church service was almost three years ago at my brother's wedding!) I was interested to give this Belief-O-Maticquiz a shot...

1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Neo-Pagan (96%)
3. Liberal Quakers (91%)
4. New Age (79%)
5. Reform Judaism (78%)
6. Mahayana Buddhism (76%)
7. Secular Humanism (75%)
8. Theravada Buddhism (75%)
9. Jainism (69%)
10. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (68%)
11. Bahá'í Faith (65%)
12. Sikhism (60%)
13. Taoism (56%)
14. Orthodox Judaism (54%)
15. Hinduism (51%)
16. Nontheist (51%)
17. Scientology (51%)
18. New Thought (50%)
19. Orthodox Quaker (50%)
20. Islam (47%)
21. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (37%)
22. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (27%)
23. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (26%)
24. Seventh Day Adventist (24%)
25. Jehovah's Witness (15%)
26. Eastern Orthodox (13%)
27. Roman Catholic (13%)

Link lifted from Jakartass

Mood swings....

2008-06-11T13:55:00.000+08:00

Looking at possible ways to get to Angkor Wat from Bangkok, I came across PMT air.

I wonder if there are times of the month when it's best not to fly with them and to use alternative transport...

Big Brother is listening...

2008-06-10T10:48:00.000+08:00

I think that my relocation company was eavesdropping on conversation with the Island Boy.

I asked the relocation company for a quote for the cats to be shipped from Bangkok to Jakarta*. The quote came back today...they've quoted for 40Kg of airfreight cargo....just how big do they think these Kitties are...??!!!!!

The two together weigh 7.5Kg...plus crate of about 10Kgs...plus the measurement allowance...never in all my days of flying cats around has the weight come anywhere near 40Kgs..!!! Needless to say, I shall be doing this myself!!

* It seems that getting animals into Indonesia is rather complicated, they cannot go direct to Bali, but have to go via Jakarta where they need to do 14 days of quarantine..and then, this is the kicker, they have to go overland to Bali...an average of about a 20 hour drive...what a nightmare...

Achmed the Terrifying Terrorist

2008-06-07T16:33:00.001+08:00

That really can't be her real name!!!

2008-06-06T12:02:00.000+08:00

Maxi Mounds has entered the Guinness Book of World Records as having the largest augmented breasts in the world 36MM...and they're still growing!

Sex and the City...

2008-06-05T00:19:00.003+08:00

"The good ones screw you, the bad ones screw you,
and the rest don't know how to screw you. "

My latest quote to add to the collection!!

BTW the movie was great...just ended too soon!!!

Will the real men please stand up!

2008-06-03T16:38:00.000+08:00

Last week I had a few hours to kill so went to see the latest Indiana Jones offering. It was as expected, entertaining, amusing, action packed, but with a little added extra...a real man...Harrison Ford does 'male' really well, regardless of his age, it's all in the attitude.

It seems that this latest performance from Indiana Jones has reawakened a certain 'longing' in the female population...for a time when men were men and girls were...well girls!

This longing for 'real men', gives us the Retrosexual. Mr Retrosexual has been around for a while, however, it seems that Indiana Jones has given a new face to the ilk!

For those of you not paying attention...modern man has changed a few times over the past 30 years...

We have had SNAGS (Sensitive New Age Guys) or Blokus Domesticus the Australian version! Then we had to suffer Mr Metrosexual.

Personally, I always thought that Daniel Craig fitted the real man (retrosexual) image - as bloody blogger is still not working properly...here's a link to gratuitious pictures

Here's hoping that Mr Retrosexual does not morph into something sensitive in the near future!

I would like to point out that there were mutterings on this very subject, on this very site, way back in 2006, whilst discussing the Milk Tray Man

It's bloody irritating...

2008-06-02T17:21:00.000+08:00

I want to put up a post with a gratuitous picture of Daniel Craig in it...and the bloody blogger picture 'thing' is not working...

I am irritated...

OK..my life is not as challenging as E@L's...but we all have our own thresholds!!!

Feline Suitcases.....

2008-05-22T23:02:00.003+08:00

It's that time again.....time to dust off the suitcases and organise feline air tickets. Bangkok has been fun, however the Island Boy and myself would actually like to live in the same place...the Gods have indeed smiled on us....we both have new jobs based about 15 minutes away from each other...sure as hell beats a 2 or 3 hour flight!!

Destination: Island of the Gods.

This time it's personal...

2008-05-02T20:53:00.005+08:00

For those following British news, you will be aware that yesterday saw council elections and voting for the new (or old!) London Mayor.

I am now so out of touch with British politics I just get the general jist of things from reading the papers, the Daily Mail is one paper that allows and receives comments.

Judging by the comments left on the Daily Mail's article about Labour's defeat at the polls; the only reason why the Tories have been so successful is because Labour seem to have really screwed things up of late and not because the Tories are so much better and offer that much better an alternative.

The elections for Mayor of London are a slightly different ball game. Here, I would beg to differ with Jakartass and my vote (if I had one) would be for Boris Johnson aka the man who pissed off Liverpool; the reason being...I really can't stand Ken Livingstone he sets my teeth on edge everytime I hear or see him...as I said...it's personal!

I wonder if Boris has cat?

Turn again, Whittington,
Once Mayor of London!
Turn again, Whittington,
Twice Mayor of London!
Turn again, Whittington,
Thrice Mayor of London!

Losing her religion....

2008-05-01T19:57:00.002+08:00

I am a little surprised by the fact that Peter Phillips' fiancee has renounced her Roman Catholic faith in order that Peter Phillips does not need to renounce his place in the line of succession, as per the 1701 Act of Settlement.

Princess Anne's son is 11th in line to the throne; following Charles and his sons, Andrew and his daughters and Edward and his two children and Princess Anne. So the chances of his inheriting the throne are slim to non-existant; added to the fact that Princess Anne has brought her children up to be as non-royal as possible even refusing titles for them when they were born.

So, why on earth would they follow this path; Peter Phillips would not be setting a precedent if he were no longer in line of succession, Prince Michael of Kent was excluded from the line of succession after he married a Roman Catholic in 1978; Peter Phillips has not carried out royal duties until now; so it does all seem quite strange!

Yes, Prime Minister....

2008-04-26T21:44:00.003+08:00

It strikes me that the last of Tony Blair's official portraits bares a striking resemblance to Jim Hacker from 'Yes, Prime Minister'

Which gives me the opportunity for a clip from Yes, Prime Minister.

Branding pitfalls...

2008-04-26T17:30:00.004+08:00

Read how implementing a new logo could go ever so slightly wrong

A spokesman for OGC said: "It is true that it caused a few titters among some staff when viewed on its side, but on consideration we concluded that the effect was generic to the particular combination of the letters OGC - and it is not inappropriate to an organisation that’s looking to have a firm grip on Government spend."

Conversations in Thailand!!!!

2008-04-26T16:47:00.002+08:00

The Island Boy is headed to Bali for a few years of work and slavery...one island to another... before he starts his new job he will be dropping by Bangkok for a few days...and would like to see some 'local sights'....this morning's conversation went a little like this...

Me: "So what would you like to see whilst you're here?"
Island Boy: "hmmm, the elephants, the floating market...."
Me: "Anything else?"
IB: "hmmm, oh yes, I'd like to do the Thai Girls"..
Me: "I'm sorry...you want to do what with the Thai Girls?"
IB: "Just go and see them...maybe pet them if allowed"
Me: "Well I guess Soi Cowboy's on the agenda then, but I'm not really that keen on you petting Thai Girls"
IB: "Not Thai Girls.....(insert here a rather dodgy sounding roar)....TIGERS"
Me: "Oh...yes, I guess that does make more sense"

Anyway...my final point on this...is, if the Island Boy is frightened of petting this....

How the hell will he be able to pet this?........

Have I got news for you....The Odd one out round...

2008-03-15T20:30:00.004+08:00

Only one of them worked in a call centre in Baghdad....

Now there's a headline writer's dream....

2008-02-22T20:53:00.001+08:00

Scientist may be first man to find the female G-spot

The writer of the article was a man...a slightly frustrated man possibly...!!

Isn't it wonderful to be British.....

2008-02-20T12:41:00.004+08:00

Whilst my parents don't particularly like the fact that I don't live about 5 miles away from their country seat, return home for Sunday lunch every weekend, have my very own perfect nuclear family and am generally perceived as being a tad 'kooky', they don't complain too much... the one thing my mother does stipulate however, is that I must register with the British embassy where ever I am...probably because I am very bad at passing on addresses, phone numbers etc!

In Hong Kong I never registered - pre-1997 - it was British, after...I just never thought it necessary.

In Jordan, registration was simple (and very effective), you went to the embassy, filled in a form, drew maps of your workplace, home etc gave all contact details necessary and that was it...from then on, you were on their mailing list for invitations and events and in case of emergency you were contactable (and findable!). There were constant security and contact updates emailed to you and you had the direct number of your "go to" person in your area. This worked very well when they were closing the borders in Jordan (and the embassy) at the beginning of the Iraq war. Lots of phone calls in advance - "are you leaving or not?" and then finally - "the embassy closes at 4pm today, the airport tonight after that you're on your own". The system worked a treat, you know where you stood.

In Manila, you were encouraged to register online, which I did. I never heard a squeak out of them...nothing..not a security warning, not an invitation to the Queen's Birthday party...nothing.

In Bangkok....I forgot, until today....so I went to the British Embassy website, they have now set up a new system called "Locate". Apparently this system means that you only need to register once...and then update your profile every time you move on. All sounds great, until you try to register....

Really - just a small gripe....but, you need to give two personal questions with an answer, the first one is easy - your mother's maiden name, the other two choices - a) your favourite band or singer ; b) the name of your street you lived on whilst growing up..... a) my favourite band changes quite frequently, and one one year to the next I would never remember that b) upto the age of 10 I had about 15 to 20 different street addresses - sure I could pick one now...and then next year when I have to update the profile, would I remember which one...

Then it gets a little more challenging. You are then sent to one of these long online forms to fill in...

1) you can only register your location for under 366 days...I have a two year contract in Thailand...its another irritant

2) and this really pissed me off...I filled in all the details...all the street address, postal address issues etc then submitted the form, and, apparently the system doesn't like hyphens or colons in the address section, so it clears the form completely and you have to start all over again.

Suffice to say....I'll try and register again tomorrow...all far too stressful for me! Pen and paper please......!

Computer error...!!!

2008-02-20T10:41:00.003+08:00

And the moral of the story is....

...always know what your POS is capable of...oh,yes, and don't mess with the service staff!!

News...

2008-02-19T10:54:00.004+08:00

Reading E@L's most recent post, I have one question for him..."How do you really feel about nodding in movies"?

The Edison Chan and "supporting cast" saga continues, Fumier's latest post on the subject delves (can't help thinking that's an unusual choice of word!) further into the 'underwear vs. no underwear vs. gossamer thin strips of underwear' issue. I haven't had the misfortune to see the pictures, however as a male friend has said - rather too graphically..."a little bit of trimming can go a long, long way!" I don't think I really need to!! The only thing I really need to know...is what kind of a man has a 'pink Mac book'??

I think it safe to say that Mohammed Al-Fayed, has really lost the plot....everyone knows Camilla's not a crocodile, she's a horse.

And...Panda Porn...

The two pandas writhe about for a bit longer. Then they untangle. It may be best to stop male pandas from watching what comes next.

"The female is not co-operative," says Dr Hou laconically.

That is an understatement

We Brits take our newsreaders very seriously...we like them to be authoritative, knowledgeable, demurely/sensibly dressed and not 'be' the story...unfortunately 'Spangles' aka Natasha Kaplinsky, is failing miserably at most of that at present. Last night was the first night of her new anchor position at Channel Five. The Daily Mail's review had one line that summed up the 'show'...Her dark blouse was unbuttoned well south of Watford.

and now for something a little different...

2008-02-18T15:21:00.002+08:00

Setting up and stripping down the ballroom at the Park Lane Hotel (Sheraton, London). A friend of mine used to work there, hence I have the link!!!

Happy Valentine's....

2008-02-14T19:30:00.000+08:00

2nd syllable.....

2008-02-13T17:33:00.001+08:00

Keeping ahead of the news....

2008-02-09T13:42:00.000+08:00

I do admit to being a news junkie...I also admit to the fact that there aren't enough hours in the day to work, sleep and keep ahead of the news all the time..

To overcome this problem, every Sunday my reading material includes the following two magazine...news in bite size pieces...

For some strange reason the book stores here never stock the most upto date version of The Week, however even a few weeks late is still worth reading...to keep abreast of what's happening around the world...

Asia Weekly, however, is always a recent addition and so usually up to the minute with the news and events around Asia...except for two weeks ago when they really dredged up some old news...

Nominated as "Blog of the Week" Flagrant Harbour stopped writing on 27th December '07; and the "recent post" they mentioned in the 21st January issue was actually posted on 29th September '07.

I suppose it all depends on your definition of 'recent'.

Chiang Kai-shek's new bed!

2008-02-08T17:28:00.000+08:00

Dinner a few days ago...arrived by delivery....and Chiang Kai-shek has slept in the delivery box every night since....

Not too sure what she's trying to tell me...

We wouldn't want to promise anything too good....

2008-02-08T14:15:00.000+08:00

Walking around Central World this past weekend with Mia (actually not sure if I should refer to her as Mia, a saucepan or lingerie!)we found this promotional board describing the events for Chinese New Year....

Perhaps it will be prosperous...but we can't promise anything...

And someone needs to tell the management of Central Food Hall...that Chinese New Year celebrates the Chinese Zodiac...not the Western Zodiac!

Traffic enforcement...!!

2008-02-08T13:59:00.000+08:00

As I looked down onto the main road this morning I noticed an empty scooter sitting in the middle of the oncoming traffic lane...no rider in sight.

I watched for a few minutes whilst the oncoming traffic avoided the scooter, and then noticed that over on the side of the street was a traffic cop booking two drivers for some heinous crime they had committed, which warranted the cop leaving his scooter in the middle of the traffic and hot footing it to the pavement. Obviously driving his scooter to the side of the road was just going to take too long.

As I am in a particularly fussy mood, the first picture (if you double click on it, will show two little boxes that highlight the scooter location and the policeman!)

Unfortunately, my picture of the unattended scooter surrounded by traffic was too blurred for use...I think I was laughing too much!

I think Fumier would have been proud of him....!

And in today's news....

2008-01-31T11:51:00.000+08:00

The And the Oscar for general society's best investment banker goes to....

How dim can people really be... my favourite was:

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)

Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?

Contestant: Goosey?

(if you weren't brought up on English nursery rhymes, then read here)

20 Things everyone needs to know.

And finally....if only it were this easy

I love US Election year.....

2008-01-26T15:28:00.000+08:00

Barack Obama presenting the Top 10 on David Letterman....

I like number 4, but I really like number 2

I think it's amusing...but then I'm not PC

2007-12-21T13:42:00.000+08:00

'Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me': Mental health charity sparks outrage with spoof Christmas carols

I particularly like 'For multiple personality disorder there is We Three Kings Disorientated Are'

Manila bound....

2007-12-11T19:37:00.000+08:00

As Christmas is not the huge deal in Bangkok as it is in other cities I've worked in, I am suddenly free for vacation between Christmas and New Year....so Manila beckons...actually...not so much Manila as the Island Boy who will be off his island and in the big city visiting his parents...

Really the last place on earth I would have imagined going to for a dirty weekend!!

Singapore....good for a stopover...but not much else...

2007-12-10T13:29:00.000+08:00

First....apologies...to those that live in and love Singapore...

My brother and I were bored...granted we have been to Singapore so many times over the years (first trip in 1978) that we really have seen Singapore and so we struggled to find anything to do over our three days...admittedly we did eat and drink well...mostly at Raffles - but venturing out to a few new places which were excellent.

We admired the Christmas decorations at Raffles...

waited for ages to get the famous corridor free of people!

We went to the zoo....

and played with the meerkats!

We went to the Fullerton for afternoon tea....

and played with the models.....(well my brother did...I didnt!)

Laughed at the shop names....and the variety of padding available....

Tried to work out the family make up allowed by Singpore taxis...

Option 1: Mummy or Daddy with the four kids.
Option 2: The ideal Singapore or Hong Kong family as decreed by both governments...Mummy, Daddy (ideally both university graduates) and three kids to continue the population growth.
Option 3: Mummy, Daddy, Amah and two kids...or Mummy, lesbian lover and sperm donor, with two kids
Option 4: The breeding has got out of control and the kids travel en masse alone.

Laughed at the shop names (as one does, when one has had a few too many cocktails at lunch time!)

as opposed to.....Fook Off

And one for the girls only.....!

2007-12-10T13:10:00.000+08:00

Finding somewhere for a Brazilian wax can be a challenge.... Hong Kong its the Mandarin Oriental salon, Manila - Basement salon - one particular therapist is excellent...but in Bangkok (odd but true - and much to The Hound's surprise!) I haven't found anywhere that is particularly good (by good I mean - hygienic, quick, professional and doesn't expect you to audition for Cirque de Soleil at the same time!)and most are confused between a Brazilian and a Hollywood wax...which can make for some alarming results!!

So I was quite pleased to find Strip when I was down in Singapore....

Its all terribly quick and efficient at Strip and helpful diagrams are offered so you can show what shape you want....

and...for those men that are brave enough...a few of their locations are 'co-ed'!!

and usually next door (and part of the same company) eyebrow shaping at browhaus. Also excellent!

Odd the things that one notices....!

2007-12-10T12:55:00.000+08:00

Whilst flicking through the Daily Telegraph website I looked at the pictures of Charles and Camilla's horse Royal Superlative....as I went through the pictures...the mouse came to rest on the picture with a description of the picture.....

I can't figure out which is which!!

SIN city...

2007-11-30T20:55:00.000+08:00

One of the joys of life at the moment are the visa runs that we have to tolerate!

This next one will be my second one - the first was to Hong Kong (fortunately coinciding with the Blue-eyed Boy's wedding), this one to Singapore (again, fortunately coinciding with a flying visit through Asia from my brother)!

So tomorrow I'm off to Singapore and all the joys that the Lion City holds...mostly for me...Raffles!!!

See you next Thursday, if not before!

So there was a 'situation' in Manila....

2007-11-30T19:17:00.000+08:00

Sorry, I have to do this... I know Spike is bewildered by the flurry of Philippine posts given that I have been transplanted to Bangkok...but seriously the happenings in Manila yesterday were quite startling!

It seems that the Philippine media has some trouble deciding which term to use for the events of yesterday, was it a coup, mutiny, putsch or a situation?

I pity the Peninsula hotel, the lobby is lovely, the Christmas decorations were up...and driving an armoured personal carrier in through the front door is a tad excessive...I think!

If it's Monday it must be yellow....

2007-11-30T19:05:00.000+08:00

When you are new into Bangkok, it takes a week or two before a weird phenomenon is noticed...every Monday the majority of the population (and by majority I mean about 60-70%) of the population wears yellow t-shirts of some description.

Apparently, yellow is the colour that Thai's associate with the day Monday. The King was born on a Monday, so since 2006 (his 60th anniversary on the throne) all have worn yellow on Mondays.

However, it seems as if pink will be the latest craze!

A master of understatement.....

2007-11-24T13:20:00.000+08:00

Reporting on Typhoon Mina/Mitag that is presently skulking off the East coast of the Philippines, Philippine Government meteorologist, Nathaniel Cruz was quoted as saying that Mitag could become a 'super typhoon' with possible winds of up to 200 mph and "The end result is that more things will be blown down and destroyed,".

You don't say........

Those of you that remember the chaos and destruction inflicted by Milenyo last year....may agree that 'things being blown down' is a bit of an understatment!

Even in another country.....

2007-11-22T11:37:00.000+08:00

...I can get pissed off about the falling billboards...allbeit this time in Cebu....

Bugger...!

2007-11-18T10:08:00.000+08:00

It seems the photo posting mechanism is not working with my blog...that's a couple of days now that it doesn't show up on the screen....any suggestions..?

OK...so it's time to start writing again!!!!

2007-11-17T16:42:00.000+08:00

I am a little out of touch...in fact I haven't read anyone's blog entries for about four or five months (except Frayed's after the recent blasts in Manila). So bear with me while I catch up on all your news!

I've had a crazy few months since arriving...working all the hours that are possible - and a few more!! Anyway, hopefully life will become a bit more normal from now on in...so I can start tentatively blogging again....

Problem is - I don't know where to start!!!

believe me....I'm busy...

2007-08-05T12:06:00.000+08:00

It's non stop at work at the moment...my present task is interviewing...in the last three days I've interviewed about 100 people... and believe me, at the end of a day doing that it's really hard to look interested and happy to see the final candidate....and listen to them whilst looking as if you are listening!

There have been a few moments of humour....normally after the candidate has left... and normally from their application form...two that stand out...

1. Where it says 'birthplace' on the form, one candidate had written 'Hospital'
2 Where it asks 'have you ever been in hospital?', one candidate had written 'Yes, I visited my friend there last week'

In my particular line of business it seems that the junior staff really move around...a lot....!!! 6 months maximum in one job...it seems that the lure of a few Baht more is better than a stable career....one guy I'd seen was 23 and had already had more jobs than I have had...!

I knew I needed my Mac for something...

2007-07-28T22:25:00.000+08:00

After last Saturday's event of tea cup contents meeting Mac...I took my iBook down to the Mac doctor today.... fortunately all seems reasonably well...the keyboard needed to be replaced...the battery also (am waiting for that)...but otherwise all is well.... so am now back home with contact with the outside world...!

Fortunately....because....I found this Youtube video from Spike...the only thing I can say..... 'Only in the Philippines.....'!!!!

It just felt like any normal Saturday morning...

2007-07-21T11:52:00.000+08:00

I can't help wondering what on earth is going to happen next...my day so far.

1. Entire cup of tea deposited over my little Macbook (aka the love of my life!!), I can't believe it...four years we've been together...four years....its terrible...its little face went black, its breathing light went off and there was a very nasty whirring noise... It doesn't look good...

2. On leaving my apartment I go down to the lobby of my building and discover all the residents being prevented from leaving (actually being kept in a holding pen!!) whilst some poor unfortunate lady went completely mental out in the entrance area, smashing glass, hurting herself..blood everywhere....this went on for about half an hour until some form of authorities came and carted her off....what a mess...

3. SMS from the Blue-eyed Boy...he's getting married...now that was a bolt from the blue....!!!! I thought he was confirmed bachelor material!!

In about an hour I'm heading out to the airport where Island Boy will hopefully be arriving from his little island of Cebu...

Hope there are no more shocks this weekend...my little brain can't filter any more information!

And there I was thinking I was an idiot...!

2007-07-18T21:42:00.001+08:00

So...I moved into my new apartment...which is very nice...the only fly in the ointment was the shower in the bathroom for the main bedroom....I had two options...scalding hot or cold...no nice hottish temperature with which to wake up gently. So every shower has been a battle in logistics of getting a few seconds of the right temperature so I can wet my hair, rinse off the soap etc etc...not good for a hangover I can tell you!

I asked my property agent...a very nice Dutch guy...if he could sort out the hot water heater...no problem came the response...so whilst I was at work he sent over his team of maintenance guys to assess the problem..."no problem" came back the reponse..works perfectly....to which I answered...did you check the correct bathroom....after some investigation - no they didn't!

They returned...checked the correct bathroom and agreed the hot water heater was a bit buggered...

Dutch property agent informed me yesterday afternoon that they had returned and replaced the hot water heater...I should have no more problems.... Oh joy...!

I got up this morning..bounced into the bathroom to have my first proper shower since arriving...and low and behold...its still a scald/chill situation...

I really thought that I had become completely incompetent and could no longer operate a shower tap properly...

I sat at my desk for a while this morning, debating whether to call the agent and readily admit I was an idiot and couldn't work a shower properly...

Eventually I called....I could tell from his tone of voice he really thought I was a complete idiot....

Late this afternoon I received a text from him...'Sorry, they changed the unit in the wrong bathroom'....

What a relief....!!!!!!!!!

It's raining....

2007-07-17T23:51:00.000+08:00

It's rainy season here....allegedly....and it's great...

When it rains here it actually drops the temperature quite dramatically so it becomes almost chilly....unlike in Hong Kong or Manila where the humidity makes it feel even more uncomfortable when it rains...it just makes the environment that much more liveable!

The drawback of this, is that I have discovered that electricity is a little unreliable here during heavy rains and thunderstorms...one Saturday evening, I lost power in my apartment six times over the space of two hours.... have just invested in sizeable collection of torches and candles!

What....?!

2007-07-17T23:46:00.000+08:00

Conversation with Island Boy this evening...

Madame Chiang: So, what did you get up to this evening
Island Boy: Went to see 'Transformers', you should go see it, it's fun...
MC: Nope, that sort of thing doesn't interest me...about as fun as watching paint dry
IB: Oh, What's that about?
MC: ....Long pause....
IB:..Ohhhhhhh!!!!

Well they made me laugh.....

2007-07-17T07:19:00.000+08:00

Grocery shopping here is great...I can actually buy Marmite and Roses' Lemon and Lime Marmalade!!! And....

And this was too good to pass up....at Siam Paragon (one of the nicest malls I've shopped in for a while), the Paragon department store has their Summer Sale on...with these signs everywhere....I couldn't help thinking how appropriate it was, given that we are in Thailand!

It's the little things in life...

2007-07-16T23:59:00.000+08:00

Well, I finally have broadband at home...and IDD....and by the end of the week, will have a new kitty to add to the household
(Chiang Kai-shek has been terribly lonely), her name is Clara at the moment...possibly options...Sun Yat-sen or Soong May-ling!

Other than work and setting up home, have done fairly little in the way of touristy things...however, the Island Boy is due in this coming weekend...so no doubt there will be some sightseeing done then. But...if you class going 'out on the town' as the touristy thing then last weekend, in the company of the always intelligent E@L and the somewhat charming (in an 'arrogant tosser' sort of a way!) company of Indy, I ventured to Dream Hotel (Flava), Bed SupperClub and Q Bar....I must say, it would have been hard to find better company for such an outing...

The Sunday evening, in the company of the same two reprobates mentioned above...saw an Indian dinner being consumed under the watchful eye of Yasser Arafat by way of a huge framed pictures directly opposite E@L's seat....I guess that will teach him to pick the restaurant of choice from a review posted above a urinal in a girlie bar at Nana Plaza.... Seriously... you can't make this stuff up!!!

here...and settled....vaguely!

2007-07-02T23:35:00.000+08:00

I must say...it all went according to clockwork!

Arrived in BKK, quarantine was a doddle, customs with a cat...no problem...picked up one of the 'authorised' limos into town, the apartment agent was waiting with the keys....after an hour or chiang Kai-Shek and I were unpacked and I was ready to start stocking the house...CKS in the meantime curled up on the bed and proceeded to sleep for about three days.

A few thoughts so far...

Tescos is good...but Carrefour...now that is amazing!!!

The Skytrain is wonderful, as are the taxis!

My colleagues are very friendly and welcoming...only the first day, but compared to some places I've worked on the first day you already know who's going to be a challenge!

The laundry downstairs in my condo block is great...washing, ironing...delivery..

Chiang Kai-shek has taken the loss of Chairman Mao very badly...and when she is not sleeping is wandering around howling..ensuring that I cannot sleep.... a kitty friend needs to be found for her.... she's a very disturbed cat. She was howling incessantly in Manila and I wondered if the move to BKK would help...obviously not....if possible, she misses him more than I do.

Without BBC World, my life is a little dull....without my work permit...no BBC World....!!

I'd forgotten how much I like Thai food!!

Things I will miss from the Philippines...

2007-07-02T23:23:00.000+08:00

Sunsets
The Philippines offers some of the most spectacular sunsets…and on a regular basis. Even after two years, I would keep an eye on the skyline every evening so I could pop outside at work to enjoy the streaks of pink, red and gold as they worked themselves across the sky – my colleagues thought I was loopy….but for me those 5-10 minutes most evenings were amazing

View from the apartment
My apartment itself was not so special, in a slightly older and a little tatty around the edges building…but the view…amazing… day, night, evening, early morning – always something different. And as I went to sleep on my last night there, curled up on my sofa bed which I had dragged over to the window for a better view, I knew that this would be something I would miss. Floor to ceiling windows overlooking the world! Unfortunately I discovered only recently that people outside on Shaw, even though I was on the 17th floor, could actually see me…as someone waved to me…from Shaw Boulevard as I stood there in my underwear!!

Evening Cocktails at the Sofitel
To really enjoy the sunset…head to the Sofitel down at the Bay…a couple of cocktails there watching the sun set over the bay…is almost as good as a few days out of town!

Sky Flakes Crackers!
Believe me, these are the best crackers in town!! As part of my farewell gift from my colleagues, they made up an emergency hamper for me with a huge tub of these crackers included!

Mango Rum liqueur
Unfortunately not one of the better known products of the Philippines and when it is used, its usually made up in cocktails….dont bother…just serve it straight on the rocks..its wonderful!

The local press
When living overseas, the usual number of English Language daily papers is very limited…Jordan had one, Hong Kong only had two….the Philippines….a huge variety. Granted the quality of writing can be a little questionable sometimes… but I cant tell you how nice it is to be able to follow local events with a number of different opinions. Plus the commentary is always enlightening, entertaining or both! I must also admit to finding some of the subject matter to be quite entertaining, I don’t think I ever opened either the Star or the PDI without finding something to amuse.

Cebu
For many reasons…!! For me, Cebu is ideal, a big city with all the services that you could ever need and yet, not a huge amount of traffic, easy to navigate and easy accessibility to lovely beaches, countryside and views. Plus, I find the local population just a little more friendly and welcoming than in Manila.

The Cinemas
Living in Manila has reminded me how much I love going to the movies…. In HKG it always used to irritate me that cell phones would be used and the general chit chat would be louder than the movie….here, cell phones are usually on silent, and conversation is kept to a minumum…bliss! OK, normally I go at off peak times…weekdays, late afternoon…but still – my favourite day off activitiy…down to Rockwell, a large Starbucks cup of tea….and two hours of escapism!!!

The people – mostly friendly, always smiling. The Filipino population really are some of the most friendly and welcoming people I have ever come across… to be honest, the number of really nasty experiences here can be counted on one hand…and unfortunately one of those just this morning as I was leaving home… I have made some really good friends here who I know will be part of my friends ‘collection’ for many years to come….

Cebu Pacific
For a mostly domestic airline, they are efficient, organized and don’t promise anything they are not going to deliver. I have probably clocked up about 20 or so flights with them over the last year…only two delays, one problem with ticketing and that’s all. I would comment though that my first flights with them last year, inflight service was a slice of cake and a bottle of iced tea, then it was reduced to just the iced tea, now…any food or beverage you want has to be paid for….but it’s a LLC so I guess its just par for the course!

The language
Having a local population that all speak either fluent English or to an incredibly high standard has been wonderful, and makes us expats very lazy…this is the first country where I have not tried to learn the language either at a language school or at work… The English level also makes it easier to make really good friends here, in HKG I have quite a few HKG Chinese friends but conversation can be hard work….they try in English my rusty Cantonese gets used…but after a couple of hours it can be quite wearing on all of us…. Here, the only time I need to know the language is when reading the papers (as they actually throw in a lot of Tagalog words) or reading books about the Philippines or books written in Tagalog and then translated into English, which keep some of the original wording….then a quick text to the City Boy makes it all clear…!

The sense of humour
Filipinos have a sense of humour particular all to themselves..its not sarcastic like the Brits, its not obvious like the Americans, its more a cross of childish humour with inuendos… I think ‘impish’ would be the best way to describe it… case in point…. A few months back I had a very unfortunate incident at work whereby I sent a text meant for someone else to the wrong person…the person who received it was offended by the content even though it was not referring to her…. It caused a huge blow up at work and took days to resolve…. A few days after this happened I texted one of my staff some information…and he answered “Copy. And, don’t worry ma’m you sent the text to the right person”!!!! I just made me laugh and lightened what had been a horrific few days. I’ve saved the text on my phone and when I need a smile I just dig it out… Another time one of my colleagues during a building inspection had jumped out of a dark corner and scared the living daylights out of myself and some other colleagues…as pay back, the next time we were doing the same inspection, a few of my colleagues covered themselves in sheets and did the same thing to our colleague…and we filmed it… impish yes, hysterical definitely! Unfortunately, the humour is only revealed when people feel comfortable with you, which can take a while..but I think I’ve had more laughs at work here than anywhere else I’ve ever worked…

And last but not least…The gravy from the sizzling pochero at Abuhan in Cebu – trust me…its amazing…I’m sure it has all sorts of bad things in there but..its so good!

I’m sure there will be other things that I will miss, late afternoon strolls around Intramuros, drinks at Greenbelt, the amusement of day to day life here… but I know I’m going to be back…

the best laid plans of mice and men.....

2007-06-29T09:46:00.000+08:00

Well it seems that three out of the five people I spoke to at Philippine Airlines were correct.... taking a cat on the plane with you is really that simple......

For those that are interested...you arrive at the airport as normal, baggage goes through the x-ray machine, cat doesn't...they originally wanted me to take the cat out and put the box through...but we agreed maybe that wasn't such a good idea...! Then a quick visit to the quarantine official, he checks the paperwork, stamps the health certificate and its over to check in...Kitty gets charged as excess baggage and gets taken away by a special ground staff who puts him on the plane....no baggage conveyor belt for her! All very simple....lets see what happens when I get to BKK!!!!

Actually, it all seems to be quite normal (I must admit due to flight/living arrangements, my cats have normally either followed me or gone ahead...I've never travelled with them...so this was all new for me).

One thing that did help was that when I arrived, for the first time, I used one of the porters that skulk at the entrance...he was fantastic...knew what to do, where to go, how to deal with the cat, excess baggage etc....absolutely first rate..and yes, I was surprised...but to be honest from the minute he saw the cat - he just rattled off what we needed to do and what the procedures were and before we even entered the airport he asked if I had all her documentation etc.... quite the expert.

Anyway, Chiang Kai-shek was last seen at the chekc-in desk, cowering in the back of her cage...poor thing, she looked terrified.. she normally has Chairman Mao with her and they normally curl up together in the back of the cage looking like big furry gloves! This is her first trip without him....so I hope she's ok...

So far all has gone according to plan, lets see what happens at the other end... updates later!

One thing that does make me smile at this airport...is the boarding announcements...always finished with "All aboard".....its hysterical, like a bus station...and it does remind me of Airplane!

Thanks to those of you who have texted or e-mailed over the last few days....I will answer when I am settled somewhere in BKK with a cup of tea...hopefully later today!

Anyway, that's my flight they're calling.....All Aboard!

Over and out!

Things I won't miss...

2007-06-28T10:29:00.000+08:00

This is the first of a two part post...the second - not surprisingly, and more postively - will be on things that I will miss...this, as titled, is things that I will not miss....

Taxis
I won't miss the smelly, dirty, about to fall apart taxis that I have been using on a daily basis since I arrived here.... I have clocked up four accidents in a taxi and one disintegration (under the Shaw-Edsa flyover - the back wing fell off a taxi whilst we were sitting in the middle of the junction waiting for the traffic to clear - the driver got out...asked me to move into the front seat, whilst he man-handled the back wing into the back seat!!). Or the taxi that mid-ride to Makati said he needed to do something urgent stopped the car, got out, flipped up the bonnet and started fiddling around with the engine.

Taxi drivers (there is a flip side to this one - see the positive post later!)
I wont miss the conniving, scamming drivers...the ones that ask for extra money due to traffic, weather, time of day/night, general political situation etc etc....
I wont miss the drivers that it is a battle to get them to use their meters
I wont miss the drivers who run out of petrol mid-ride (happened twice), or on one occasion, the driver who mid-ride asked if I could advance the fare so he could fill up with petrol... actually this made me quite sad - it just goes to show the hand-mouth lifestyle that the lower classes here have...nobody should have to deal with that...worker or customer.
And I sure as hell wont miss being turfed out of taxis because either the driver has changed his mind, or I refuse to pay any extra over and above the meter.... I've been turfed out on Edsa three times (usually late at night - not fun) and once in Cebu, fortunately in the middle of Lapu-Lapu city where there was a friendly policeman!

The Airport
I don't know where to start....!!!!! It's a disaster....organisation, cleanliness, security, its all bad....Manila International Airport does not have one redeeming feature that I can think of.....from the wildlife, to the terrible shopping and f&b facilities, lack of a decent bookstore, the process for getting to check in....its all bad....and arrival at the airport is even worse!

Waste of resources
The Philippines has a lot going for it...language, education level, fantastic tourist sites and locations, vivid history, diving, lovely resorts, a generally friendly and welcoming population, great shopping, relatively good weather..... so why is it not a booming, flourishing nation with a bright and rosy future.... the political situation and the government are mostly to blame but...and I tell my Filipino friends this....the problem is 'resignation'...the other day whilst catching up on blog reading...a post by Torn & Frayed, had one sentence in it that whilst in this case was referring to political killings, I think refers to the Philippines in general....

He is battling against the biggest ally of all politically motivated killings—the resignation of the Filipino people.

he goes on....

An almost unlimited well of stoicism it this country’s greatest strength and its most overpowering weakness. It sees balikbayans through the most terrible experiences from Jeddah to Singapore to LA and almost all points in between and somehow gives them the strength to come out of it all laughing. It enables Filipinos at home to smile despite low wages, poor living conditions, and some of the world’s worst traffic. It is an absolutely necessary quality in the often brutal world of modern Manila.

Yet stoicism has its limits. Putting up with crap is all well and good, but there comes a point when you have to change the world instead of just putting up with it

....I copied pasted, because i couldn't have written it better myself. Never have I come across such a waste of resources, such complete and utter chaos and such resignation..... it's tragic.

The Peeing
I don't understand why Filipino men have this urge to unzip their trousers and pee where ever they wish..... it is disgusting and its unhygienic.... Whilst in BKK I actively looked to see if this was an Asian thing (although have not seen it in HKG or Singapore!) but in three days...not one guy standing close to a wall, lamp post, tree etc relieving himself.... here I see on average three or four a day when out and about.... its not nice.

The staring
It's not polite and given the number of foreigners that have been in the country, one would think we were not a rarity...granted if I go way out into the provinces...being blonde and rather - how can I put this -'busty'??!!, I can understand that I'll get a few looks...but in the Metro Manila area there is no excuse for the out and out staring that goes on...whilst waiting for a cab, walking down the road, in a mall, wherever...again, its not nice....

The overall feeling of chaos, disorganistion and dirt
Self explanatory....I loathe it!

The supermarkets
Quality, items available, supply and again, organisation - all lacking....although I would say that the new Rustans at Rockwell is an improvement...a few more like that would make life more pleasant.... they even have conveyor belts at the checkout counters (I'm a simple soul really), and it's clean, bright and doesn't smell....!!! OK, I know I'm being fussy - when we lived in The Gambia in the mid-80s we only had butter for four months of the year.... a real treat was a mini tin of condensed milk, meat was purchased in the market - usually half a cow and we would take it home and butcher it... so yes, this is an improvement....but on the other hand, we are now in 2007, 20 years on, in a huge city with a large expat population...

The overall lack of trust
There is an overriding lack of trust in this country that is shown in the way that purchases are handled in a store (packed and checked off against the receipt, not being able to leave without the receipt visible), the way that credit card purchases are handled, the way that people are frisked going into and out of establishments, even moving out of my apartment needs security checks etc (and its my belongings that are being checked...as if I have broken into another apartment and stolen their items). I realise that this lack of trust is due to previous abuses of trust, due to the levels of poverty in the country....but still it is quite disheartening that this is the case.

I think that's basically it....no doubt I shall think of other annoyances but, off the top of my head, these are the ones that have bothered me the most whilst I have been here!

When I told my friends and colleagues two years ago that I was moving to Manila...to a man (and a woman), they could not believe that I would do something that daft...nobody, including those that had worked here had a positive word to say about the country.

Here I am two years later and the same friends and colleagues are amazed that I have managed two years here. Quite a few people that I have spoken to don't understand my frustrations with day to day life here...but (and I have gently explained this to them!) these are people who have drivers (removes the taxi stresses!), helpers for shopping, running errands etc, and other little bits of help like collecting things from the post office (all things that relieve stress)...Granted, compared to the average Manila resident I lead a charmed life here, I can use taxis instead of buses, I do have the spending power to shop and eat in the better places and I live in a secure apartment.

The reason I guess I get so agitated about all of this is that, if all goes according to plan, my time in the Philippines is not yet over...Bangkok will be just a short 'break' for us....I repeat, if all goes according to plan (which in my life it rarely does), I shall be returning to these shores to set up home with the Island Boy! Which means that I will have to face this all over again....

Leaving the Philippines....

2007-06-28T09:29:00.000+08:00

I have to say that the last few days of my time in the Philippines have been incredibly stressful....all of it indicative of the lack of organisation, decision making and trust that is inherent in organisations here.

When I was in BKK last week looking for my new apartment, I spent some time with one of my new colleagues, a Thai lady, about the same age as me, well travelled and with fairly strong opinions on Asian countries...HKG - fine, Singapore - very nice and organised, Japan - interesting, the Philippines....and here the conversation went south....I have rarely heard such a negative description of the Philippines - the end result was she told me that in a past job one of her colleagues had won (at a staff party) an all expenses paid trip to the Philippines for two....the colleague who had won, was so horrified at the thought of going to the Philippines he passed up on the prize and offered it to his other colleagues...nobody wanted it, the prize was unused.

In summary, my week has gone something like this....

Visa application.

My new company have been processing visas for their new expats team from HKG, Singapore and KL, they have managed about 4 visas so far by submitting the same required documents in all three cities. They gave me all these documents and I traipsed down to the Thai embassy in Makati. On arrival i was told that my documents were insufficient at the guy gave me a printed checklist of what I needed...so I contacted my HR in BKK and told them...they were a little bemused given that other countries embassies didn't need this but over a period of a few days they organised, scanned and sent me the required documents.

On Tuesday morning, once I had all the documents, I returned to the embassy, the same guy who gave me the list was behind the desk, looked at my papers and then said, this is still insufficient, I now need..this, this and this.....so I asked why it wasn't on the list...the conversation went something like this..."

MC:"Why are these extra items not on the list you gave me?"
Embassy Staff "Who gave you this list?"
MC:"You did, last week, don't you recognise your handwriting at the top showing the opening times?"
ES: "Actually No I don't, I never recognise my own writing, anyway, sorry about the inconvenience but I need those papers before it can be processed"

Now, bearing in mind this was Tuesday morning and I was supposed to be flying Thursday morning, I got a litttle tetchy. I called my HR in Bangkok who (not surprisingly at this stage!) lost her cool and decided to call the Thai embassy in Manila..... she called me back a few minutes later (I was by this time in a taxi, heading at some speed (sod's law - the one time the traffic is clear!) to Wack Wack Road!)...and told me to return and submit the forms..... she had spoken to the Thai people at the embassy who had something along the lines (and I wont write the derogatory terms used) that the Filipino at the front desk didn't know what he was doing..... I went back and submitted the forms.... allegedly today.... I should get a visa.... in hindsight...lucky I've had so many problems with Philippine Airlines that my flight was pushed back to Friday.

My frustration at the whole exercise aside.... it has amazed me the attitude of the Thais to the Filipinos....so much for developing nation/Asian kinship.....

Philippine Airlines.

First off, on Monday I booked my ticket on line....at the end when entering credit card details etc, there is an instruction telling the user that if there is a problem after 'submitting' cc details then do not resubmit but contact PAL

Sure enough, after submitting the details there is an error message...allegedly a problem with their system...no emergency contact number is given...just an e-mail address. So I send off an e-mail giving the error message, my mobile number and telling them what happened.....to make it easier to read the sequence of events will now be in point form (!)

Tuesday morning I get an e-mail back from them (an e-mail note, not a phone call as requested), asking for my flight details, which I submitted...I still have not had an answer to that e-mail.

Wednesday I tried unsuccessfuly to get through to their reservation department...in between the movers and all the other bits and pieces going on

Finding that you cannot book PAL online if you are less than three days out on your travel date I have to get through to them by phone.

Finally Wednesday evening I get through....although due to being put on hold and cut off three times, I had to keep calling back - the whole process took about an hour.

You cannot pay over the phone using a credit card, because you have to go to the ticket office with your passport. On asking why this is the case compared to online booking, it is apparently because if you book over the phone they include the airport tax in your final payment...so as a resident foreigner who they take about P2,300 every time you try to leave the country...plus the departure tax, they want to collect that before issuing your ticket. Way to go Philippine Airlines...making it as difficult as possible for the passenger.

And then we now have the small problem of the cat..... three calls to PAL over the last week, to different departments, different levels of management have confirmed (allegedly) that all I need to do is show up at the airport, cat in hand, papers correct and I can check her in as excess baggage.....but last night...the goal posts moved....now I need even more paperwork, I need different forms that no one seems to know where to get and I apparently have to inform everyone of this cat's arrival from BKK immigration to Thai air ground staff and I think somewhere there was a mention of Cherie Blair. However, I cant do any of this without my ticket, which I cant get without my passport which is being held hostage at the Thai embassy......

I would like to point out that whilst in BKK last week I did speak to the Thai immigration and quarantine officials at the airport to check with them on the correct procedures for bringing in a domestic pet....nothing they said...just turn up with the paperwork and the cat and we will check it and issue its entrance papers.

The removal people

I have moved countries myself a few times...left HKG twice, left Jordan and with my parents - many, many times.

In HKG and Jordan, both my shipments were larger than they are leaving here...both places the packing was done in half a day, a quick break for lunch and then everything moved out after lunch...all done and dusted by 4pm latest.... here...a totally different story...

Arrived at about 8:30am, still packing at 5:30pm...need to come back in the morning to finish packing and move everything out....

I only have about 40 boxes...the majority of it is books.... the guy packing my bedroom took 2 hours to pack three boxes of items...

In addition, they randomly left out items which I then had to collect up and pack myself last night....

And they are still here....

I won't bore you with ranting about my condo's 'moving out' procedures and security.....

The sad thing about all of this is that when talking to my Filipino friends about this last night...they all shrugged their shoulders and said...what do you expect...its the Philippines....particularly scathing comments were reserved for PAL... most asking why I was bothering to use PAL...my answer... I thought it would be easier with the cat (obviously not!) and I couldn't bear to leave Manila through that bloody awful terminal 3..... I dont want that hell hole to be last vision of Manila!

There will be more positive posts later!!!!!!!!!

Billboards.....

2007-06-27T15:13:00.000+08:00

Those of you that have been reading me for a while know that I have a few issues with the billboards that blot the landscape of Manila...in particular along Edsa...

On arriving in Bangkok last week I noticed that the road to the airport has some huge billboards...one of them is incredibly long (Samsung) I think...

It seems that the Thai govt has a few issues with the billboards....I wonder if they will be any more successful than the Philippine government?

Well, we are both packing.....

2007-06-27T10:54:00.000+08:00

I would imagine that Tony Blair's day today will be a little similar to mine...granted I'm not going to be meeting the Queen, granted I have already resigned, granted I am not moving out of one of the most famous addresses in the world....but we've both got the bloody packers in....!!!!

After 10 years, one month and a few weeks as PM, Blair is finally handing over to Gordon Brown. It's been an interesting 10 years, we've had his 'People's Princess' moment, we had the first baby born to a Prime Minister in however many years, we had Iraq (correction, still have Iraq), the dodgy dossier, spin, Cherie, Alistair Campbell, the 'war on terror', G8, 7th July, 11th September, Northern Ireland, the Good Friday agreement...and many, many other interesting, embarassing and odd moments.

For a good roundup of all things 'Blair'...go to the Daily Telegraph's page. Particularly informative/amusing is the assessment of the Blair Christmas Cards

And whilst on a car theme....

2007-06-23T12:01:00.000+08:00

When I was in Bangkok at the beginning of the week, house hunting, I had an hour to kill whilst lurking in a shopping mall....and discovered they had an aquarium...actually a very good aquarium at that....

the only thing was that the mangement/creators of the aquarium should win an award for the oddest collection of items being used as fish tanks...

we had a car...

a fridge....

a microwave...

and one that didn't come out was a wine storage cabinet...

All I can say is that someone was obviously bored one day and thought..."what can I put the fish in today?"

One thing I can highly recommend here is the jelly fish section, I've never seen jellyfish in an aquarium before and this display is quite incredible...and makes your skin crawl...particularly for me who had a nasty experience when I was about 9, in Dubai....me, complaining for most of the day that my stomach hurts, my mother telling me to pull myself together, getting home and finding two little jellyfish had spent the day in my swimsuit!..not sure who screamed loudest when they fell out of my swimsuit in the shower!!

Why?

2007-06-23T11:58:00.000+08:00

Confusing art.. English style

Chairman Mao

2007-06-22T00:19:00.000+08:00

About nine years ago whilst standing outside Sogo in Causeway Bay, a little black and white kitten stuck his little scrawny head out of a garbage bin and started squeaking at me. As I was in the market for a cat and was planning to visit the RSPCA the next day to adopt a cat, I thought this black and white bundle of fur was a perfect choice.

So Chairman Mao moved into my Discovery Bay apartment. Due my long hours at work and his rather affectionate character, Chairman Mao started to suffer from seperation anxiety and so needed a friend. A return visit to the garbage can behind Sogo found another bundle of fluff who joined us, enter Chiang Kai-shek!

Chairman Mao and Chiang Kai-shek have joined me moving house in Disco Bay, joined me in Jordan, came back to Hong Kong and made it to Manila! Unfortunately only two of us will be moving to Bangkok. Unfortunately, after a period of being really ill, Chairman Mao died on Wednesday morning.

My little black and white bundle of fluff that followed me around the house, slept across the top of my pillow every night, sat at the end of the shower every morning, 'mothered' endless foster street cats in Hong Kong and watched endless TV with me, been in endless scrapes and adventures and generally been my comfort for the last nine years....has left us.

So now its just Chiang Kai-shek and I against the world.

HELP....!!

2007-06-18T19:55:00.000+08:00

I am in Bangkok at the moment house hunting....and when I access blogger....everything is in Thai....which
I cant read!!! Does anyone know if there is a language default thing I can change...and if so where it is...as not being able to read anything I dont know which part to access!!!

The revenge of the Trucial States...

2007-06-18T19:52:00.000+08:00

First this....

'A scale model of Concorde which has had pride of place at Heathrow Airport's entrance for 16 years has been removed.......Emirates is to put its own model up on the site.'

then this....

'Dubai is to buy the Queen Elizabeth 2 cruise ship for $100m (£50.5m) and turn it into a floating hotel off the Gulf emirate's man-made islands.'

Well it explains a fair bit, anyway!

2007-06-09T09:51:00.000+08:00

Seb Coe is partially colour-blind

Personally, I think the offical logo is awful, an embarassment even.....my money would be on something a bit like this.....

selected from these....

And, if you don't know what I'm talking about, read here

One wonders what is taught at schools these days?

2007-06-09T09:44:00.000+08:00

From a conversation this morning....

"By the way, the door was the building guy complaining about the size of my rubbish"

The cats need more air miles.....!

2007-05-25T15:30:00.000+08:00

Seeing as you have all become bored of me blogging endlessly about my numerous trips to Cebu and equally numerous gripes about taxis in Manila...I've decided to come up with a new subject to blog about.....and strangely a new location....

So, from the beginning of July (Insh'allah), I shall be living in the city which has this river...

a myriad of Temples and Palaces...

and neighbours like these...

It's all in the wording...

2007-05-24T20:13:00.000+08:00

Whilst sunning myself in Cebu, my colleagues were left to move our office to a temporary location whilst our old office is being renovated. I packed most of the stuff in my office before going away, but there were still some bits and pieces in my desk. When I came back there was a box in front of my new desk.....however the word 'table' was missing...

My colleagues couldn't understand my hysterical laughter, until I explained that in England 'drawers' is the old fashioned word for underwear

A little reading....

2007-05-21T21:08:00.000+08:00

What was nice about a week doing not much more than lazing in the sun and stroking tarsiers….was catching up on some reading…

The Boleyn Inheritance

The Other Boleyn Girl

Ghost Soldiers: The Forgotten Epic Story of World War II's Most Dramatic Mission

Innocent Traitor

Seven Year Itch

Not Buying It

Infidel, Ayaan Hirsi Ali, My Life

As you can see, I mean it when I did nothing much but read!

...said the actress to the bishop!

2007-05-19T18:16:00.000+08:00

Was just sitting quietly watching the sun set and the sky turn that lovely shade of deep blue...when my phone bleeped with a message....

From the City Boy

"So did you ever have your fill of spotted dick?"

It seems someone has been watching the Food Network channel and has learnt about another culinary speciality

It just gets better....

2007-05-19T12:56:00.001+08:00

From the PDI on Wednesday...came this little snippet of worldly wise information....

Election update....

2007-05-12T14:55:00.000+08:00

Continuing from my previous election post...

City Boy and Island Boy are already on holiday and are in Cebu driving north for a few days at the beach....City Boy just texted me and tells me that they are driving through Danao City...aka the gun-making capital of the Philippines (we have a bit of a standing joke about this tendency of places here to label themselves as the 'something' capital of the Philippines!). Silly me, and I thought everywhere in the Philippines was the gun capital, however, after a little research I see that it's correct...apparently when the elections were announced..business heated up!

With the whiff of elections in the air, the gunsmiths of Danao City are working
overtime to meet demand for their signature .38-caliber revolvers.
"The orders start coming in three years in advance," said one weapons merchant,
who would not give his name. "If you don't have guns, goons and gold, you will
not win an election."

This from E@L - have swiped the picture - he won't mind, all things considered I think he owes me one!!!!

Just before I go...

2007-05-12T11:13:00.000+08:00

From 12:01am Sunday morning to 12:01 am Tuesday morning, there is an alcohol ban in the Philippines - no alcohol can be bought, sold or consumed in public places (hotels, restaurants and bars included)..this is all apparently to make sure the voting population behaves themselves...foreigners are excluded...!

One of my more cynical colleagues stated that the alcohol ban was so that the hired assasins could shoot straighter....

So whilst Island Boy and myself are sunning ourselves in Bohol, I can get progressively drunker and he will have to stay sober! as they said in Airplane"I guess the foot's on the other hand now, isn't it Kramer?". Actually it feels a little like the day before Ramadan starts in Jordan..I have this urge to go out and stock up on vast quantities of alcohol!!!

However, we're not back for long!

2007-05-12T09:14:00.000+08:00

Off to sunnier climes tomorrow night...a week in Cebu, with a few days in Bohol (apparently, allegedly!) seeing the chocolate hills and stroking tarsiers (at least that's what I'm telling you!!!).

And we're back...

2007-05-12T09:12:00.000+08:00

Apologies...for those of you who were a tad confused about access to Madame Chiang over the past few days...it was just a little self-preservation!

How much is that voter in the window....I do hope that voter's for sale.....

2007-05-04T07:05:00.000+08:00

As promised earlier..a short post on vote buying..again, a selection of headlines to give you a rough idea of what's happening..

New vote buying schemes - in case the others were all a tad old fashioned

A thousand pesos for my vote

Phone cameras can be used for vote buying

Insurance cards not used to buy votes - just remarkably convenient timing..'The cards were given to over two million party members as “an act of prudence and gratitude” to “loyal members,” he added.

At the same time, he said the cards were distributed to party “campaigners and poll watchers who under the law are entitled to reasonable allowances or compensation…”'

Comelec reporters receive P100 cell phone cards

Is it a prize, or is it vote buying

And this is a classic headline...40% believe Arroyo will cheat

Given the violence and the vote buying, I have a few questions...

1. Can the Philippines really be classed as a democracy?

2. Is it really worth having the elections?

3. Is it really worth while being a politician of any description in this country?

4. Will there be enough politicians left alive in the country to actually have an election on the 14th May?

Answers on a postcard to.....

I was asked the other day how much it costs to buy votes in England...I answered that to the best of my knowledge at grass-roots level vote-buying doesn't really exist or at least not the form of cash/phones etc exchanging hands as it does here; however at more senior levels allegedly a peerage could change hands...

Childish...but who cares....!

2007-05-03T21:55:00.000+08:00

Whilst at the House at Pooh Corner, I purchased a Pooh Bear for the City Boy....it wasn't until afterwards that I looked at the receipt and saw the description...

10" Soft Pooh

Away from the Big Smoke

2007-05-03T07:43:00.000+08:00

Other than my two days in London, the rest of the time was spent pottering around the family seat in deepest darkest Sussex…venturing out only to visit such exciting places as....

Batemans, home of Rudyard Kipling

And The House at Pooh Corner – surely that needs no explanation

And playing Pooh Sticks at Pooh Bridge...

Some friends of mine came to visit on my last weekend in England so I showed them around the village (actually more of a hamlet)...

The local church

The Local Pub (most important!)

The War Memorial

Sporting pursuits in the back garden! 9 holes of Pitch and Putt golf... and a spot of archery

After purchasing golf balls here!!!!!

Election at the O.K. Corral

2007-05-02T21:01:00.000+08:00

So for those of you outside the Philippine archipelago...it is mid-term election time...due to being out of the country and now having to catch up on work I am a fairly busy lass, hence I'm not reading the local papers with my usual fine toothcomb and so periodically I am just quickly scanning the front page of the Inquirer website...

What is alarming at the moment is the number of people that are being shot at - injured and killed - in election motivated attacks, plus the number of people that are being 'threatened'..and therefore asking for protection..

A smattering of headlines for your reference / further reading...

unexploded grenade was recovered inside the headquarters of a re-electionist mayor

former police officer turned politician was shot and killed...was seeking a seat in the town council

A mayoral candidate of a town on Bantayan Island in Cebu was shot dead in front of the Commission on Elections (Comelec) provincial office

seven political candidates in Metro Manila have asked for additional security from the police

Mayor hurt, aide killed in fiesta attack - actually this one is worth reading....'The latest deaths brought to around 30 the number of people killed in violence since the start of the campaign period.'

Congressional bet slain

Bloodiest poll incident: 2 dead, 12 hurt in N. Ecija

2 dead, 3 hurt in Nueva Ecija shoot-out

Seriously....I could go on, but I might bore you....

And then we have this....apparently not election related...just 'hate' related..

CAMP VICENTE LIM, Laguna, Philippines -- Three unidentified armed men waylaid a village chief while he was driving his car on a bridge in Naic town, in the province of Cavite early Tuesday, police said.

Victim Joselito Mutas, 52, the village chief of the village of Sabang, died instantly from several gunshot wounds in the body.

Senior Superintendent Fidel Posadas, Cavite police director, quickly dismissed the killing as election-related.

"This is probably a hate crime because the victim was shot a number of times using at least three kinds of firearms,"he said over the phone.

next election installment...'vote buying'...

A senseless tragedy at Banaue

2007-05-02T06:44:00.000+08:00

Before I left for England for my holiday I had arranged with the City Boy that we would go to Banaue and then Batad to see the famous rice terraces…

I got back into Manila on the 17th April late night, on the 18th afternoon (having hibernated all morning) the City Boy called and asked if, given what had happened, did I still want to go to Batad…

Fresh back into the country, I hadn’t seen a paper, hadn’t looked at the internet, I had no idea what he was talking about.

On Easter Sunday (8th April); a 38 year old American Peace Corps Volunteer called Julia Campbell was reported as missing. She was last seen hiking around Batad. On the 18th April her body was found, in a shallow grave on the hiking trail into the village of Batad. By this stage no body knew how she had died, but it was obvious from the fact that she was found in a shallow grave that it was not an accident.

So, did I still want to go to Batad, yes…but I would just have to be a little bit more aware of my surroundings than normal.

I’ll write more on my visit to the rice terraces in another post, but for now…just a few disconnected observations.

When we hiked from Saddle Point down to Batad, the hiking guide pointed out the area where Julia had been found, there was a long discussion with the City Boy in Tagalog, most of which was not translated – probably censored for me.

I did mention to the City Boy that in most other countries the area surrounding the shallow grave would be closed off with police tape…’do not cross’ etc…however, in this case unless it was pointed out, one would be none the wiser. The next morning, though, when hiking out of Batad on the same path, as we passed the shallow grave area the City Boy noticed a crumpled piece of paper lying in the grass a few feet away…

On closer inspection, handwritten in biro, on the scrap of paper was ‘Police Line – Do Not Enter’… at least someone had tried….

Batad village was incredibly quiet, don’t get me wrong I think even when there are a lot of visitors there it’s not exactly Piccadilly Circus’ lesser known cousin, but the inn that we stayed had about 15 rooms, only two rooms were occupied – the City Boy and myself in one and a Filipino family who had arrived with us in the other. According to the village residents, it does seem as if the number of visitors (particularly foreigners) has dropped off in the wake of Julia’s murder.

I didn’t realize until I read Carlos’ post that Julia had a blog…if you read through it you really get a measure of how happy she was living here and how much she gave to the country through her work here – it’s so tragic the way her stay in the country ended.

The prime suspect in her murder case has been ‘handed in’ by his mother and is now in police custody…reading his story, makes the whole thing seem even more heartbreaking and wasteful.

Complete fluke of nature....allegedly.....

2007-05-01T09:46:00.000+08:00

In response to E@L's claim that I 'got the annual sunny day'...I would like to say in England's defence (and mine, in case anyone thought I was greedy!) that I actually had a whole week of glorious weather...which the BBC will back me up on...and just to prove it to you...I shall try to run through a set of photos of my week in England...it seems that there were (surprisingly enough!) days when I didn't take any photos, so Tuesday and Thursday's weather...you'll have to take my word for it!

Sunday

Monday

Wednesday

Friday

The weekend...in Sussex...yes, the family home is a little like an outdoor sports facility, and these boys had lost their balls!

Rather odd really....

2007-05-01T07:42:00.000+08:00

Whilst wandering around Fortnum and Mason and looking at their partially renovated food hall I happened to see a mouse scampering around on the floor between the shoppers. Because I wasn’t 100% sure what I had seen I stopped and watched it for a minute or so...another shopper said to me "Did you see what I saw?", so I replied "If you’ve seen it as well...then it definitely exists".

The other shopper (a rather elderly gentlemen) called over a security guard to point out the little rodent...the conversation went like this..

Elderly Gentleman: I saw a mouse
Security Guard: Where?
Elderly Gentleman (singing): There on the stair...
Madame Chiang (also singing): A little mouse with clogs on – well, I declare
Going clip-clippety-clop on the stair - oh yeah

Only in England could two complete strangers start singing something as bizarre as ‘Windmill in Old Amsterdam’

And then it started to get all serious...and they started to hunt the little mouse! So I left!

Samuel Johnson was on to something….

2007-04-30T07:13:00.000+08:00

‘...when a man is tired of London, he is tired of life;’

A full day and night in London is just not enough…it really is the most amazing city in the world.

It helps having a friend who works in a rather nice hotel who can put me up in rather nice accommodation, leaving the cash to be spent on the likes of dinner at Maze, shopping and just generally skulking around the city.

Dinner at Maze…what can I say...it was fantastic.

I had the BLT and the Foie Gras to start followed by the veal and the lamb...dessert was a peanut butter and cherry sandwich. Wines...a wine flight taking in a Michel Wust Gewurtztraminer (cannot recommend it highly enough - if you can find a bottle - buy it!!!)and a Spanish Red - Realte...which was fantastic

Added to the copious glasses of wine consumed at the hotel bar before and after dinner, I was quite merry and unfortunately could not make best use of the bottle of Champagne put in my room for me to enjoy!!

I was incredibly lucky with the weather in England for the week I was there…it was glorious...I even came back with a hint of tan! So a little walk around London was definitely something to be enjoyed...

I started off in Oxford Street...just next to Selfridges

Then wandered down to Piccadilly Circus,

Down the Haymarket to Trafalgar Square...

A quick visit to my painting in the National Gallery..

Then down to Westminster Abbey

And the Houses of Parliament….and of course, Big Ben…

Downing Street

Horse Guards Parade

St. James’ Park

And down The Mall to Buckingham Palace

Buck House

And finally..Green Park and then home!

A good four or five hours walking with a few well chosen stops...for tea normally.... Fortnum and Mason, The Chocolate Society in Shepherd Market...

At the Star Ferry in Hong Kong

2007-04-29T19:10:00.000+08:00

It's the little things that make me laugh....!!!!

Normal programming resumes...

2007-04-29T16:06:00.000+08:00

I'm back....a two week holiday taking in England, Hong Kong and Banaue has ended...I'm now dealing with the onslaught of work and also editing the thousands of photographs I took...that's the problem with digital photography, I just knock off hundreds and hundreds of pictures!!

Will post pictures and notes on my travels as soon as I can catch my breath. And hopefully have time to catch up on all my fellow bloggers going's on...

In the meantime, many thanks for your e-mails etc checking that I was still in the land of the living! All much appreciated!

Light's out....Spot the Difference....

2007-03-31T16:16:00.000+08:00

So where Hong Kong failed...., Sydney looks as if it might get it right...

Hong Kong

Some restaurants and bars resorted to candle-light, but office towers, tourist venues and sports stadiums remained bathed in neon.

"It wasn't what we were hoping for," said organiser Alastair Robins

Hong Kong leader Donald Tsang had refused to back the black-out, saying it would damage Hong Kong's image as an international tourism and business centre.

Sydney

At 1930 (0930 BST) lights will go out in tower blocks, on the iconic Opera House, and in tens of thousands of suburban homes in an orchestrated plan.

The so-called Earth Hour is supported by the New South Wales government, environmental groups and businesses

I think this could be the one...

2007-03-31T07:33:00.000+08:00

Finally...after over a year and a half I think I may just be able to go back to the UK to see my family....those of you that have been reading for a while will have been aware of my attempts to get home...so far in the last 15 months I have had my leave cancelled due to a suicide (not mine!), major upheavals at work and a resignation (again, not mine!)....so my flight is confirmed, my leave form is signed...

I am due to fly out on Saturday 7th April....a week in the UK, followed by three days in HKG, followed by a trip with the Island Boy and the City Boy up to the rice terraces...finally!

Now my leave has been cancelled before on less than a week's notice so am not getting unduly excited! Plus I haven't dared tell my parents or my Grand-father, I think yet another disappointment would not be good....we shall see! My brother received the news with a rather heavy dose of sarcasm...

I spoke to my brother last night and we have decided that the element of surprise is best....so I wont tell my parents at all...and the plan is this...

1. On Thursday, on his return from a business trip to Geneve, my brother will let drop into conversation that the airline lost his suitcase on his return trip.
2. On Saturday, my brother and his wife will drive down to the family home in Sussex, en route he will call my mother and say that the airline have called and his suitcase is at Heathrow but he needs to collect it personally because it is so badly damaged (he will have to call to start the story as my brother has the family trait of being a terrible liar face to face - but he can just scrape by on the phone!).
3. He'll leave his wife at my parents house and drive up to Heathrow to collect me (aka the badly damaged suitcase!)
4. When we get to my parents house, no doubt all will be asleep...so I can just sneak up to my bedroom and get some kip.
5. Next morning I can just wander down wanting to know if there's any chance of getting a cup of tea...!

Let's see if the plan works...!!! Nothing like a bit of a surprise for everyone!

And in other holiday news....I received an SMS the other day from my mother telling me that my Grand-father and his girlfriend had gone to Nevis for two weeks....at the time I did wonder what they would be doing up a mountain in Scotland for two weeks at this time of year...but it's my Grand-father and he likes his walking...anyway, after talking to my brother yesterday evening I discover that he is in all reality, sunning himself in the Caribbean...it's tough at the top!!!

Sometimes...just sometimes....

2007-03-30T08:39:00.000+08:00

George W. Bush says something amusing....

...'the president spoke of plans for his post-White House memoir - he said that former President Bill Clinton had written a 10,000 page-long tome.

"I'm thinking of something really fun and creative for mine," he said. "You know, maybe a pop-up book." '

To the hills....

2007-03-26T15:53:00.000+08:00

Sunday morning breakfast in Tagaytay with the City Boy...lovely weather...beautiful view! We left home at 6:30am and the traffic was still pretty bad...didn't make Tagaytay until about 8am!

After breakfast we drove down to Sonya's Garden (a B&B) to have look. The cottages are lovely...and the bedrooms very twee; definitely worth a stay at some time in the future.

and then all too quickly back to reality in the shape of Manila!!

Oh yes, and Saturday evening at the Philippine Plaza for Ziggy Marley's concert...

All Change.....

2007-03-22T09:03:00.000+08:00

So we have the nursing exodus from the Philippines, predominantly to the US...but also to the UK. (This is a link to a Newsnight interview on the subject) My father was recently in hospital and he said that almost the entire nursing team were Filipinas...

Now, however, we have the nursing exodus from the UK, British nurses wanting to go to Australia to escape the NHS.

Rumours of my demise...etc etc etc....

2007-03-21T19:21:00.000+08:00

Iraq is now into it's fifth year since the invasion....and it's not looking good. But, they do have 'Good Morning Iraq' and it seems, a TV Chef...

Do polar bears even like Elvis Presley songs??!!!!

Donald Tsang takes 'shoe shining' to a level previously unseen by mankind....

TIME: You worked a long time with the British, and now with the Chinese. What's the difference?
TSANG: We are a lot freer now. The only thing the central government has a keen interest in is our constitutional development. Every other thing, our economic policy, our social policy, is run from here. Before 1997, London would clear those things. Every morning I would spend three quarters of an hour reading telegrams from London, and do another two hours of [related] work. I never do that now.

TIME: So Beijing is not micromanaging your government?
TSANG: Not micromanaging. Not [even] managing. There are things they are interested in. Foreign affairs, but I don't care about that. That is done by the Ministry of Foreign Affairs representative here. As for national defense, we have got the People's Liberation Army here. They are much more well-behaved and disciplined than their British counterparts before. Previously, every week, there would be brawls.

And this....it's all wrong!!!

The Philippines has supplied most of the world with domestic helpers, medical staff, catering staff, people willing to work where noone else will...and now...weather forecasters!

I wish I could cook four meals!!! I can manage beans on toast...and a mean scrambled eggs from the microwave (the Island Boy was well impressed!)..and that, dear readers is the sum total of my culinary skills!

The Philippines has the answer....

2007-03-07T15:17:00.000+08:00

Reading Shakey's post about HKIA's new hand baggage restrictions... I realised that the Philippines has the answer to all the world's hand baggage security issues...

(toothpaste 9ml, moisturiser 60ml, deodorant 8g)

The items photographed above were just what I could find in my desk drawer...rest assured every basic brand and product comes in mini size...moisturisers, shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, deodorant, shaving gel...its all there with all the different ranges...and all very easily available!!